Top 10 Pro Basketball Player Names (2003-2004 edition)
Every year around the start of the NBA season I do this somewhat ridiculous (but fun) ranking of player names. This year I decided to work on my methodology a bit. Rather than just picking the names I liked the best from the NBA's list of active players, I made a list of 15 or so candidate names and then I imagined both Bill Walton and Marv Albert using those names in their signature expressions.
For Bill Walton, the saying was
{Player's name}... the intensity, the speed, the explosiveness... the utter disregard for his physical health and well being.
For Marv Albert it was
Yes! {Player's name}... from downtown!
Then I scored each expression and ranked them. After some shuffling--I had to award bonus points for unintentional hilarity--here's this year's list:
10. Earl Boykins
9. Darko Milicic
8. Moochie Norris
7. LeBron James
6. Nikoloz Tskitishvili
5. Ruben Boumtje Boumtje
4. Kareem Rush
3. Zydrunas Ilgauskas
2. Lucious Harris
1. Nenê
(For comparison: last year's list and the year before.)

